“Are you ready yet?” I asked. “No” she replied with a grimace crinkling her face.
“You’ll probably surprise yourself how well you do. Do you want to just try and see how it goes?” I knew the answer before she said it as she looked away. “No thank you.” In that moment I felt that perhaps I was pushing too strongly or too often, and it was making her feel bad about herself. Like she was disappointing not only herself, but me as well. I let it rest for a while.
Then one day a few weeks later out of the clear blue she asked to try something we both knew she had outgrown. She wanted to take a step backwards. I wondered what this was all about. But she had a sparkle in her eye and a new curiosity. “She’s going the wrong way” I thought, but let myself take her lead to learn where this would take her. Perhaps nowhere. Perhaps just around the proverbial block to end up back where she started again. Perhaps somewhere she’s never gone before.
And that’s exactly what she did. She took herself with ease into that unchartered territory and came out successful. She knew that she needed to revisit the tried-and-true: those skills that she had honed and could count on. Then she asked me to help her take a small step toward her goal. It was still scary but she had just reminded herself of the confidence she had in her abilities so it was an easy choice.
After a few wobbles and adjustments, she got the hang of it. Within a very short period of time she had achieved her goal. Lickety-split. Boom. Just like that. She came to my side and asked, “Are you so happy you could just burst into tears?” She was beaming. I told her, “Yes I sure am.” I beamed back at her with motherly pride. As I watched my daughter ride a bike for the first time without training wheels, she called to me with a smile across her face and said, “I went from fear to no fear!” Her self-awareness astounds me.
The next day her Dad got out the big bike. She resisted. I resisted. But he insisted. She nervously got on the bike that had caused her such fear and zoomed around like she’d been riding bikes for ages. The encouragement my husband and I offered her was helpful, but nothing like her own thoughts about herself and her abilities. She believed in herself, even though this was something new and something big, and she proved to herself that you must first trust yourself in order to accomplish anything.
She reminded me that sometimes you have to take several steps backwards before launching yourself into something new. That even though others may be pushing you to do something, you must listen to your own inner wisdom. That you will amaze yourself at what you can do if you are willing to take it at your own pace. And that once you start, your momentum will take you farther and faster than you can imagine.
In your own journeys, I wish you the same insight. Trust yourself. Do what you need to do. Ask for help. Then move from fear to no fear.
As always, unlock your potential and experience your possibilities.